This past week, Kevin had an intensive surgery (due to a sports related injury, not his heart…thanks goodness!). Hours after his surgery, as the clocked ticked in the hospital room, I simply stared at him with intense wonder and awe, heart filling up with emotional waters, ready to burst at the seams. The love was flowing, people! How did I ever get to be his wife? Honestly, he is perfect for me.
Simply put, Kevin is everything I never knew I wanted.
You see, growing up, I had made this list of everything I wanted in a future husband. Besides the obvious qualities of funny, kind, compassionate, etc. (all those things that Kevin excels at), I envisioned this crazy extrovert who loved public speaking, working a crowd, and being the life of the party. Someone, I guess….like me.
When I first met Kevin I was instantly attracted to him. Tall…dark…handsome…CHECK. And I really loved being with him. He was chill, up for anything, easy going, and hilarious. So we started dating, and had a lot of fun adventuring.
But in the recesses of my mind, the mold I had always envisioned my “future husband” would fill, wasn’t there with Kevin. I so desperately wanted him to be what I had planned for my mate. I expected him to act a certain way, and when he didn’t, I’d give him the cold shoulder, or confront him with his obvious lack of reading my mind (why do we women do that?!?!?).
And here’s the thing, I was so focused on wanting Kevin to be what I had concocted for my spouse, that I missed the pure beautiful goodness of enjoying exactly the way God made him. There was a defining moment for me when I realized I destroying our relationship by expecting Kevin to be who he was not.
He was not a crazy extrovert who loved to public speak.
He was a conversational introvert who loved serving behind the scenes and doing whatever people needed him to do.
In short, he was A ROCK. A man that loved generously and freely, that held no expectation over others (which allowed him to still adore me for all my quirks, support my dreams, and BE ME).
When I allowed God to change my heart, throw my “husband list” out of the proverbial window, and choose to embrace Kevin for the amazing man of God that he was, our relationship blossomed in a way it never had before. Shortly after, we were engaged and married, and I’ve never for a second doubted or looked back. In fact, since that very day, I have literally thought Kevin was the most amazing man i’d ever met, and I still believe that.
The bottom line here is that I almost missed my soul mate because I was too into my own plans. I actually broke up with Kevin for a little while because I felt there was someone better for me, someone that fulfilled my “list” to a greater degree. I praise the good Lord that He led me right back to Kevin, and took those blinders off!
Friends, our plans are not always the best for us. God’s are. God is the only one who can see the future, and the only one who loves us fully and perfectly. He desires the best for us. TRUST HIM. I literally wake up every morning and thank Jesus for the gift of my sweet husband. There is no greater joy, short of salvation, than being married to my sweet Kevin.
I’m so grateful I tossed my plans for some better ones, and didn’t miss out on the man that loves me better than anyone else in the world. So I didn’t get my crazy extrovert. But I did get the most faithful, loving, kind, compassionate, Godly, humble, servant-hearted, hilarious, fun and adventurous man I’ve ever known. And for that, I have much to be thankful for.
Happy Monday sweet ones. Today may you drop your expectations for others, embrace them fully, and trade your modest plans for God’s incredible ones!!